pam kueber - April 3, 2012, Updated: April 2, 2012
Retro Renovation stopped publishing in 2021; these stories remain for historical information, as potential continued resources, and for archival purposes.
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28 comments
Comments
Martasays
I think the term is a little demeaning, personally. It seems to evoke the image of a man whose activities center on watching certain sports on huge televisions in a room where it’s okay to spill beer and popcorn all over the furniture and floor. While most men I know would lobby heavily for the big tv, they’d also want a phenomenal sound system, shelves for books and videos, etc.
Just wanting a room where they feel they can relax, with comfortable furniture and decor that doesn’t make them feel like they’re in their grandmother’s ‘kept perfect for company’ living room doesn’t make a guy a caveman.
I agree with Patty that the term is just overused. The decorating and house hunting shows seem to go out of their way to make it seem like every guy is desperate to have one.
Laurynsays
I am so lucky to be married to a man who hates the term and the idea of a man cave. Though we both need (and get) time to ourselves, there isn’t any part of our little house that isn’t a space both of us use and whose look and design we are both invested in. I personally think the term just conjures up all sorts of stereotypical b.s. about the nature of male-female relationships and reduces men (and women by default) to caricatures sold by the media. But I probably shouldn’t get going on that rant, at least not here!
Our house has a “rumpus room” that J keeps referring to as his “man cave”. I then tried calling it the “bar area” but he still keeps calling it the “man cave”. Then his mom made him a sign that says “man cave” and I don’t think there’s any hope of calling it anything else. I asked where my “woman cave” is in the house and he told me I can have the laundry area. Nice.
Patricksays
I hate the term– it evokes images of tacky psuedo-mascuiline decor such as industrial steal tables, crappy beer and nascar. Not that there is anything wrong with any of those things, but they are not a decorating style that I would want.
I would much rather have a classic den or a library than a “man” cave. Don Draper’s office for example, or many other classic masculine styles. This is much preferable to me than many of the other styles that the “man cave” seems to bring out.
My husband wants to finish our basement to include a “man cave”. This is probably because I do all the home projects, thus the tool area is “my space” and I do all the car stuff, so the garage is also “mine.” I told him he could have his man cave in the laundry room, as long as he does the laundry, but he didn’t think that was very funny…I think he just wants somewhere to put a huge tv and all of his football decor, which I agree can live in said “man cave” when we construct it.
Jasonsays
My home has one living room with the fireplace, tv etc. I have a breezeway that I sit in sometimes and if I were to make one of the bedrooms into a more casual (I sometimes miss a lazyboy) sitting room it would be called a den – that seems to fit in my 1956 house.
However, my vote in the poll was… is if it includes a…..then I want one!
KDAsays
I hate the idea of “man caves.” All it says to me is that women and children should neither be seen nor heard by their men folk. I wonder why these men bother having families when it seems like they can’t wait to get away from them. And since women still do the bulk of child care and chores, from what exactly are these men trying to escape? OK, you got me started . . . .
Pattysays
Man Cave is just as over-used as the word “pop” as in a pop of color.
In the MCM world, it might have been referred to as a den, or a study. Now, it’s become a real estate sellers buzz-word, or a guys way to say that the whole house isn’t designed by the wife. It’s become so-over used, and has become a catch-all phrase as well.
I am a man, and I have no cave. But because I live alone, I don’t have to make any compromises or sacrifices with my partner. When I get to that stage in my life, I would like to have just a little space of my own that’s all mine and has no compromises, and I’d offer the same luxury to my partner.
There have always been “man spaces” – workshops, garages, etc. and I’m not sure what changes by calling their current equivalent a “man cave”. It’s either a broad statement about masculinity and gender norms in modern society, or it’s just cute wordplay. I’d put my money on #2.
Marta says
I think the term is a little demeaning, personally. It seems to evoke the image of a man whose activities center on watching certain sports on huge televisions in a room where it’s okay to spill beer and popcorn all over the furniture and floor. While most men I know would lobby heavily for the big tv, they’d also want a phenomenal sound system, shelves for books and videos, etc.
Just wanting a room where they feel they can relax, with comfortable furniture and decor that doesn’t make them feel like they’re in their grandmother’s ‘kept perfect for company’ living room doesn’t make a guy a caveman.
I agree with Patty that the term is just overused. The decorating and house hunting shows seem to go out of their way to make it seem like every guy is desperate to have one.
Lauryn says
I am so lucky to be married to a man who hates the term and the idea of a man cave. Though we both need (and get) time to ourselves, there isn’t any part of our little house that isn’t a space both of us use and whose look and design we are both invested in. I personally think the term just conjures up all sorts of stereotypical b.s. about the nature of male-female relationships and reduces men (and women by default) to caricatures sold by the media. But I probably shouldn’t get going on that rant, at least not here!
Jenny A. says
Our house has a “rumpus room” that J keeps referring to as his “man cave”. I then tried calling it the “bar area” but he still keeps calling it the “man cave”. Then his mom made him a sign that says “man cave” and I don’t think there’s any hope of calling it anything else. I asked where my “woman cave” is in the house and he told me I can have the laundry area. Nice.
Patrick says
I hate the term– it evokes images of tacky psuedo-mascuiline decor such as industrial steal tables, crappy beer and nascar. Not that there is anything wrong with any of those things, but they are not a decorating style that I would want.
I would much rather have a classic den or a library than a “man” cave. Don Draper’s office for example, or many other classic masculine styles. This is much preferable to me than many of the other styles that the “man cave” seems to bring out.
Kate says
My husband wants to finish our basement to include a “man cave”. This is probably because I do all the home projects, thus the tool area is “my space” and I do all the car stuff, so the garage is also “mine.” I told him he could have his man cave in the laundry room, as long as he does the laundry, but he didn’t think that was very funny…I think he just wants somewhere to put a huge tv and all of his football decor, which I agree can live in said “man cave” when we construct it.
Jason says
My home has one living room with the fireplace, tv etc. I have a breezeway that I sit in sometimes and if I were to make one of the bedrooms into a more casual (I sometimes miss a lazyboy) sitting room it would be called a den – that seems to fit in my 1956 house.
However, my vote in the poll was… is if it includes a…..then I want one!
KDA says
I hate the idea of “man caves.” All it says to me is that women and children should neither be seen nor heard by their men folk. I wonder why these men bother having families when it seems like they can’t wait to get away from them. And since women still do the bulk of child care and chores, from what exactly are these men trying to escape? OK, you got me started . . . .
Patty says
Man Cave is just as over-used as the word “pop” as in a pop of color.
Glenn Soucy says
In the MCM world, it might have been referred to as a den, or a study. Now, it’s become a real estate sellers buzz-word, or a guys way to say that the whole house isn’t designed by the wife. It’s become so-over used, and has become a catch-all phrase as well.
Nick Klaus says
I am a man, and I have no cave. But because I live alone, I don’t have to make any compromises or sacrifices with my partner. When I get to that stage in my life, I would like to have just a little space of my own that’s all mine and has no compromises, and I’d offer the same luxury to my partner.
There have always been “man spaces” – workshops, garages, etc. and I’m not sure what changes by calling their current equivalent a “man cave”. It’s either a broad statement about masculinity and gender norms in modern society, or it’s just cute wordplay. I’d put my money on #2.